[neo--queen--serenity]

The whole vampire household has been touting how Guillermo is “just Nandor’s familiar” for over 4 seasons now. And even at the beginning of this episode, Nadja says it again! She says, “why don’t you take him to urgent care, Nandor, he’s your familiar.”

But once Nadja gets him to urgent care, and the vampire doctor says he’s going to put Guillermo down, she immediately says, with no hesitation, “You can’t do that! Because…because he’s OUR familiar!!!!”

Not just Nandor’s. OURS. And then she proceeds to fuck up that entire clinic to save Guillermo, to protect him and bring him home, even after learning about him being turned already. That’s the good found family shit right there.

[shamebats]

For years ppl were like "if I met Colin Robinson irl I'd love to listen to him, maybe he'd bore YOU but I'm different" so the writers responded by going "umm actually that kills the Colin Robinson, what you're saying is you'd drain and kill him, you monster"

[somecunttookmyurl]

i can tell i’m sleep deprived bc i just made myself cry about tutankhamun and i have, like, negative interest in the kid

[somecunttookmyurl]

have now made the rest of the discord cry about this little boy who had multi-coloured ducks sewn onto a tunic that he loved so much he wore it to a Very Important Event because he was EIGHT and have you SEEN my DUCKS

[somecunttookmyurl]

sorry no i’m not done i’m gonna make you all cry some more i’m bringing you down with me

there was once a little boy.

he is born disabled. his body hurts, and he can’t walk properly the way the other children do. he doesn’t understand why. he’s a little boy. but he plays with wooden boats and pulls toys on a string.

somebody makes him a tunic. they sew ducks onto it in red and green and yellow and blue. the bright colours of a child.

the little boy is eight years old, and he’s going to be king now. there’s a big ceremony about it. he doesn’t really fully understand what’s going on, because he’s eight, but he wears the tunic with the brightly coloured ducks for the occasion because he loves it. look at his ducks! aren’t they great?

he is a child. the adults around him manipulate and coax him to gain more power for themselves. he still plays with toys.

as a teenager, not yet an adult, he fathers children. they do not survive. he’s not even old enough to have full agency in his job and is still being manipulated, but he had babies and they died.

he does not make it to his twenties. at eighteen or nineteen years old he dies, and is buried. his babies, so tiny, are buried with him.

and so is his tunic with the little ducks that he loved so much he kept it long after it no longer fit.

there was once a little boy.

[somecunttookmyurl]

yeah i think that like. especially with historical figures in your mind people who were kings and queens or important nobles were adults. even if you know how old they were it doesn’t really click. it doesn’t seem real

but then you get something like a little tunic with brightly coloured ducks on it and it hits you like a fucking truck that this really was a little kid and no matter how far removed you are a little kid is still a little kid. their brains didn’t develop any quicker back then. he was just as developed/mature mentally as any 8 year old now. he had cartoonish animals on his clothes and he played with toy boats and probably terrorised the local cat population.

tutankhamun was a child and he didn’t make it to adulthood because he was unfortunate enough to be a very important child

his dad died when he was 8. he saw his own babies die when he was still just a boy himself.

but he had brightly coloured little ducks on his favourite shirt, and he kept it.

[somecunttookmyurl]

and he did not just keep the duckie shirt either

tutankhamun had a little pair of sandals with ducks on them. he had earrings decorated with ducks. he kept those, and other items of childhood clothing. some toys. keepsakes. things he loved, and treasured. he kept them all in a little wooden chest. the chest… was carved with ducks.

and that little duck chest, filled with things he kept from his childhood, was buried with him. maybe he was keeping them for the little babies who did not make it. maybe they just reminded him of good days and fun times.

but he was a little boy who thought ducks were just the best

[somecunttookmyurl]

WITH PLEASURE

(greyscale makes it hard but the duck head is on the right above the toe strap. always takes me a while to find it too)

[beggars-opera]

[thefloatingstone]

King Tut was treated horrible as well because his father, Akhenaten, had been the Pharaoh to try and completely change the religious and cultural structure of Egypt which had been stagnating for a few hundred years. He moved the Capital away from Thebes, he rewrote the Egyptian religion under a singular god named Aten, which took a LOT of political power away from the religious priests. His wife was Nefertiti. Tutankhamun had a different name when he was born, Amenhotep.

We don’t know for sure how Akhenaten died, whether it was poor health or assassination, but Nefertiti died very soon after and disappears from all records. Tutankhamun is renamed with a more traditional name.

All of Akhenaten’s statues, temples, and murals are attempted to be destroyed as much as possible. The religion of Aten is scrubbed as much as possible. Power is wrestled back into the hands of the old priests where it used to be before Akhenaten tried to implement changes. Everyone tries to make things back the way they were before so they can once more control Egypt the way they used to. SO that they can have back that power.

8 year old Tutankhamun is made Pharaoh.

[foundinconstellation]

Something about immortal couples loving each other through centuries and proving that love does transcend time and change

[never-nevermore]

when nandor finds out guillermo has a british boyfriend

[idontwikeit]

We need to be a lighthouse!

[oh-good]

I want frenchie and wee john to bring a kitten on board and when people are like "I thought you said cats were witches?" Frenchie will be like "they are but the way I figures it if we raise this one ourselves we'll have a witch on our side" meanwhile wee john is feeding it bits of meat

[leithianxx]

i'm just thinking about the moonlight scene and the Jenkins interview yesterday about Stede being an unwitting seducer and it just makes the scene so much more enjoyable to rewatch. From Ed's perspective this guy is pulling the smoothest moves of all time, like the most forward, i'm about to sweep you off your fuckin feet lines, looks him right in the eyes and tells him straight up "i'm gonna make you fall in love with me rn." And it COMPLETELY works on Ed like he can't even breath he's being so actively seduced. And even though Stede isn't doing that on purpose at ALL it's almost even MORE effective because he's being so authentically genuine and truthful that he is just exuding pure kindness and love and insight into Ed's soul. It's just so funny to me thinking about how Stede has absolutely no idea what he's doing to this man in that moment.

And it paints all future interactions with them with a completely different brush because one of them is consciously aware of the VIBEZ and one of them is only subconsciously aware. Ed thinks Stede knows what's up so he is purposefully flirting in all their little moments but hesitates to do anything outright because he's getting mixed signals from Stede, he just doesn't know the mixed signals are because Stede doesn't know that Ed knows that he's feeling a vibe and Stede himself doesn't even know what the vibe even means for himself.

It just really subverts the power dynamic that you would expect from this naive sunshine man meeting his broody hero. Stede holds all the power here and he has NO idea that he has Ed wrapped around his finger. Ed wants to leave bc he's afraid of the intensity of his feelings and the mixed signals from Stede and Stede is like "no <3" and puts on a cute outfit and takes him on a walk and makes Ed stay. Stede says he doesn't like Ed's personality around CJ and Ed is so gutted he leaves FOR STEDE not for himself but to spare Stede from himself. While they're being arrested Stede literally just SMILES at ed and ed signs his entire life away for him. 

I just think keeping all of this in mind is so important to understanding why their break up is SO melodramatic. Stede has unknowingly taken Ed on this emotional rollercoaster and he's been at following around Stede at his feet like a puppy dog just WAITING for a sign that this is real and Stede isn't toying with him so on the beach everything finally falls into place for the first time and Ed can finally just RELAX he isn't crazy and the power dynamic has shifted so that they are finally on the same page, he doesn't have to feel like he's just pining anymore, they are equally in love and that is so reassuring and validating. AND THEN HE LEAVES. That is such insane emotional whiplash and he was wrong the whole time and he feels like a fucking idiot and he must be SO FUCKING CONFUSED. Because the moonlight scene it seems like Stede is being so fucking crystal clear about his intentions and how could he have possibly got all of this wrong, and he ws right the whole time because Stede kisses him back and agrees to run away but actually no he was WRONG the whole time but how??? and yet it also goes back to that exact same scene where Ed tries to kiss him and Stede doesnt return the energy where this dynamic becomes so unbalanced and murky

no one touch me, alexa play motion sickness  

[userstede]

CON O'NEILL as IZZY HANDS
⤷ quotes from David Jenkins for The Verge

[avelera]

This is an anti-creampuff-ification of Stede Bonnet account. Yes, he is nice but Stede is also insane. He clearly has the eyes of a madman. The most fearsome pirate that ever lived is his soulmate and he regularly impresses this guy with how unhinged he can be. He reads bedtime stories to bloodthirsty pirates, among whom is one who openly talks about his cannibalistic inclinations. Another of his crew was raised by a murderous nun to be god’s perfect killing machine. This is Stede’s found family and he is perfectly aware of these facts about them. Stede ran himself through on Izzy Hand’s sword to win a duel and he smirked as he manipulated a bunch of poncy nobles into setting their own ship on fire. He felt completely at home in Spanish Jackie’s bar until they actively attacked him to get him to leave and he screamed FUCK at the top of his lungs while trying to find the right inspiration to scare the shit out of a bunch of Dutch merchants then SUCCEEDED at scaring the everloving shit out of Blackbeard accidentally in the process. His only notes on Blackbeard’s crew going on a murder spree to demonstrate how to capture a ship was to appreciate their gusto and the efficiency of not missing the chance to rip the gold teeth out of a dead man’s mouth.

And yes, this is the same man who thought making a turtle fight a crab was mean, because he has standards. Very, very unhinged standards. He is a walking contradiction of genteel upbringing and an unabashed craving for a violent life of crime, like a duck raised by chickens discovering the water. All in all, I find this very sexy of him and in the privacy of my brain I will be fighting to the death anyone who tries to morph him into a sweet inoffensive cinnamon bun who is too good for this world, too pure.

[ofdreamsanddoodles]

i appreciate ofmd’s “it’s only 1717 when it’s funny” approach to historical accuracy. pinnochio was written in the 1800s. the real israel hands should be 16. pyramid schemes. stede being in that incredibly modern theater teacher outfit. anyway i think lucius should know who lady gaga is but no one else does

[laniidae-passerine]

Our Flag Means Death Reductress headlines (1/?)

[noisbat]

ALT

[randomfandomss]